Still Learning...(or, Hard-fought Gratefulness)

Happy Half-way though September!We easily see the halfway mark of a month...not so with a life!But one thing is certain for we plowing through forties, fifties and beyond,barring the exception, we have well surpassed the halfway point of our lives!Wow! How much I don't know that my younger self thought by now I would!! 'Live and learn' has become my middle-age mantra.Still so much to learn! I was going to post this poem this morning after the first stanzathen I felt a little niggle, like another stanza jiggling the door knob,so I opened it...The door turned out to be a floodgate...of things still being learned!😅 Still learning to give holy thanks, to think before I speakTo seek and prize the lowly ranks of ‘blessed are the meek’To cling less fiercely to the string of Things and Plans unfurledTo make the shadow of God’s wings, my refuge in this worldTo lay up treasure where no vice corrupts, mars or defilesTo weigh the payoff, not the price of walking ‘second miles’To not rebel beneath the ‘nope’ of mercy’s faultless rodBut, to anchor my hope in steadfast promises from GodTo keep the faith, not disillusioned by what blurs my viewAs breath by breath, death closes in, till ‘still learning’ is through To count my blessings, not life’s lack, to make the most of nowBefore tomorrow’s looking back beholds its rendered HowTo trust the Love that withholds wants and wishes for my good BestTo teach me how to better bow without proud, loud protestTo stun me with the goodness of His all-sufficient graceAs wonder over wonder floods the would-be commonplaceTo satisfy my longing with the whisper of His NameHe helps me press toward the mark until faith’s prize I claim…to cast before His throne, the honor of crown upon crownsTo hail our Heavenly Father faithful through life’s ups and downs To yield, with all my heart, not just a small part, now and thenTo know that He is able and changeless for aye, amenTo commit to His keeping all I do not understandTo fit my doubting fingers through the nail-holes in His HandTo place my cares, prayer upon prayers into ‘Thy will be done’To put on God’s whole armor to withstand the evil oneTo ask Him to set a watch over the door of my lipsBecause, oh Lord, how easily the unbridled tongue slipsStill learning how to listen, to be slow to anger, ohStill learning to keep turning to the One who loves me so Still learning to linger in Time’s showcase of majestyWhere fringes of God’s glory overflow sky, sod and seaWhere EL OLAM, Eternal God, thought cannot comprehendThe rock of my salvation and my nearest, dearest friendStill learning to be awed by God’s resolute holinessStill learning to be patient when His answer is not ‘yes’Still learning to remember what I ought not to forgetStill learning how to follow the example Jesus setAnd how to keep my balance on the beam of consequenceWhile I harvest the bitter fruit of disobedience Still learning to esteem and redeem precious, numbered daysWhile learning to keep leaning on God’s very patient waysStill learning to depend upon His Word that will not fail(Sometimes I share a chuckle with the mirror’s telling tale)Glad for a sense of humor while I weather what I mustBearing in mind what will survive this grind of dust to dustWhile learning through mistakes I wish I would know nothing ofThe tender pangs and aches of highs and lows that come with loveAnd learning, while still learning not to miss the measure earnedOf triumph’s hard-fought gratefulness for truths and lessons learned © Janet Martin How precious is Your loving devotion, O God, that the children of men take refuge in the shadow of Your wings! O LORD, do not withhold Your mercy from me; Your loving devotion and faithfulness will always guard me.